After reading the passage about Jesus feeding the 5000 today I sincerely asked God to show me something new, this passage is not new to me at all but I know God is faithful and teaches me new things every day. My attention was brought to the part of the passage where is says, “Jesus had compassion on them.”
14 When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them and healed their sick. Matthew 14:14
Soon after this the disciples were concerned about the growing crowd and the fact that dinner time was approaching. Instead of turning to Jesus who had made water into wine and made the blind to see they suggested he send the people away to buy food for themselves.
15 As evening approached, the disciples came to him and said, “This is a remote place, and it’s already getting late. Send the crowds away, so they can go to the villages and buy themselves some food.” Matthew 14:15
I am sure the disciples were exhausted and ready for their long day to come to an end. The crowd must have been exhausting and certainly not something they were accustomed to dealing with up until they became disciples. They may have been having a selfish moment wanting to send the crowd away so they themselves could get some much needed rest. They could have also been faced with an overwhelming feeling of incapability. I am sure they truly cared for the crowd and didn’t want them to go hungry. They were likely just trying to be proactive about the situation. Either way they didn’t turn to Jesus and ask him to provide for the needs of the crowd to be met.
Sometimes I can feel incapable and disqualify myself from something God has called me to do. When God calls us to fill a need or be there for someone He always provides. We may feel inadequate but He will give us the words. We may feel too weak but He will give us the strength. We may feel as though we have nothing to offer but He will bring the offering. We need to trust God and His plans for us as well as others He places on our hearts. Every detail is a step of obedience that is an important part of His plan.
This past Christmas I had an amazing opportunity to play harp in palliative care for a complete stranger. Someone had made me aware of the situation this woman was in and although she didn’t ask for my help, I saw a need that I knew God had gifted me to fulfill. It was just days before Christmas, this would not exactly be a fun thing to do just before the holidays. Visiting someone who was leaving this earth too young just before Christmas was a depressing thought and not to mention how busy I was. I had every reason in the world to disqualify myself and no one had any expectations of me anyway. But I knew God was calling and I could not ignore. With my small harp I played on her bedside and shared my testimony with her. It was a huge privilege to share my story as God led. The gateway into her heart was through my harp music, if it were not for the comfort harp music brings there would not have been any reason for me to suggest I meet her. As it turned out this would be end up being her last opportunity to hear the good news of the gospel and I got to be the person God used for this purpose. Having God work through me giving me the right words with a calm heart was an amazing experience.
I am not a preacher or a pastor but God has called me into these situations on more than one occasion. It can be difficult, please don’t be led to believe that just because I go I find it easy. He calls us all into these situations if we are willing to hear His beckoning voice and be ready with an open an obedient heart you’ll hear the calls come more. As these appointments approach I feel so much resistance from Satan that I know it’s the will of God. The resistance and the things that Satan tries to throw in my way thus affecting me and those around me are unreal. With much prayer God delivers and gives strength, the right words are spoken and the perfect time is appointed. Most importantly God shows up right than and even goes before me preparing their hearts. I have never been left abandoned in these situations however I have learned to enter these appointments and exit them with much prayer. The battle of prayer is just as important as the hitting the target. Do I get scared? You bet I get scared, and incredibly nervous. In this situation I had never met this person before in my life and yet I was going to meet her at a very vulnerable time. Just as unreal as it is for Jesus to turn a small meal for one into a meal that fed 5000 God wants to be there to provide for us in order to meet people where they are at. Notice I said provide for us? If we meet people where they’re at God shows up in two ways, He shows up in us and uses us to reveal Himself to them. There is a double blessing, one for us and one for them, the miracle in His ability to work through us and the work that He accomplishes in them.
in the clay,
Chantal Dube