But You Wouldn’t Let Me
Updated: Jul 25, 2021
As I read Matthew 23 this week the phrase “…but you wouldn’t let me” kept coming forward to me.
37 “O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the city that kills the prophets and stones God’s messengers! How often I have wanted to gather your children together as a hen protects her chicks beneath her wings, but you wouldn’t let me.
I began to wonder if there was some way that I wasn’t allowing God to protect me. Maybe if you’re like me you can find yourself depending on someone else to protect you like your spouse or a friend. The problem with this is that you’re placing unrealistic expectations on them and it’s only a matter of time before they fail and you feel abandoned, let down and perhaps even rejected.
In Deuteronomy 26 the Children of Israel built a wall to protect themselves and it was knocked down.
52 They will attack your cities until all the fortified walls in your land—the walls you trusted to protect you—are knocked down. They will attack all the towns in the land the Lord your God has given you.”
It makes me consider other ways I may not be allowing God to protect me. Is it just others I depend on or is it also walls I put around myself? How am I not letting God protect me in hopes that my walls are guarding me against hurts.
I can often be the type to put up walls to protect myself, just like the Children of Israel. My wall is built with bricks of: independence, control, high expectations of others, contrary feelings, denying God’s power to lead me, not allowing what I know to dictate what I see, fear over faith, assigning thoughts to others and holding them accountable, stubbornness, anger, unforgiveness and the belief I have about staying hidden so I can stay in control and feel safe. In order for God to protect me, these bricks must be torn down. This comes first by admitting to them and secondly by giving each of these fears to God knowing I can trust Him fully.
Maybe you can relate to some of these bricks that I have in my wall. We can’t deny the truth and ignore God, our wall will be knocked down and it will turn our world upside down when the very thing we thought was protecting us crumbles to the ground. We need to call upon the Lord for protection when we feel triggered and tempted to add another brick. Instead of trying to protect ourselves we must surrender to God and trust Him in whatever plan He has for us. This seems so simple but how often is God our ‘go to’ when we are feeling vulnerable or in a crisis? It’s simple because God want’s to make it easy for us to do but it’s so simple perhaps we minimize the power God has over every situation in our lives.
This brings me to one of my favorite verses:
So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.” ~Deuteronomy 31:6
I love the part of that verse that says, God will personally go ahead of you. How can we minimize that! God, the Creator of this world personally going ahead of us sounds more secure than depending anything else. Let’s remember to invite Him into our lives daily, knowing that He is walking ahead of us. Trust in Him and have peace about it!
in the clay,