This is a question I asked myself a few weeks ago.  A friend of mine lost her baby.  A miscarriage.  It ripped open an old wound of mine that I thought had fully healed.  I had suffered infertility for 9 years and  I wanted to carry this loss for my friend.  I told her I wish it had been me because I knew how to carry that burden.  It wasn’t fair.  It’s never fair when a nice loving couple who has a warm home to welcome a baby into get’s their dreams crushed by such a loss.